LAKESIDE HASH HOUSE HARRIERS HASH TRASH
Run 1016, 17 December 2003
Hare: The Boomerang
4/39 Horne Street, Elsternwick
Report from the lounge-ridden guest scribe
On the 17th day of December, my hash club gave to me:
one beautifully stuffed turkey two bowls of potato salad three bags of bread rolls four litres of ice cream five cartons of custard six sinkfuls of dishes seven kilos of ham (well lots) eight types of beers nine dips and biscuits ten happy harriettes eleven leggy hashers twelve circle charges thirteen whoops it must be an omen see later
It was a very happy and full Lakeside hash that had their Christmas run from Boomerangs place in Elsternwick. With the temperature still in the 30s it was a shortish run, with Punch giving a deliciously vague report of up and down various roads, over the railway, on to the drink stop and back, and then finished with a score of 76 out of 72 it must have been the heat creating such numerical accuracy!
The circle toasted the indefatigable Shagadelic as chief feast organiser and Boomerang for the fine turkey. And the food and drink it started at the drink stop with champagne and orange and savoury biscuits, followed by gourmet beers and dips back at Boomers. Main course of cold turkey, ham, stuffing with assorted salads and bread was preceded with the pulling of Christmas crackers and silly hat wearing. The brave forced down seconds, with GG silly enough to sample the delights of Boomers super hot mustard. And if that wasnt enough, dessert included mince pies, Christmas cake, brandy custard and grog-laden plum pudding ice cream. Only Kakadu could manage seconds on the ice cream.
One special run went to Boomerang for his 150. Non-significant runs were duly charged to Toto 76, Damien 13 (ooooh), and SBD 43.
And the omen then came true with Damien subsequently christened, not as Shagpile or The Omen as predicted by some, but due to a flash of inspiration by GG (must be non-football season) as UNDERFELT by Klingon as RA, with the orange Christmas hat and sunnies perched on the top of his head receiving the appropriate amount of baptismal fluid.
Lots of booze and food brought out the garrulous and with Udder as acting Sergeant, a never-ending stream of charges were laid. With Mummies Boy clapping time during the singing, these included: Boomerang for being late to his own drink stop! Rolf for falling asleep before the run Cheesecake something to do with handcuffs and Dennis say no more Lotsafun for being winged, supposedly at badminton Mummies Boy for his John Hopawatu finger impersonation Klingon for the first time, having left Chicko at home last Saturday night Sooty for not having shaved for the Christmas run with an appropriate down down of custard Nephertits (on his second run) for bringing his Red Dress drag outfit all the way from Canada Kakadu for not dressing up as Santa this year (shame, shame) SBD a Claytons charge something to do with the synchrotron design Scullery Maid for being a kitchen slave (again) Shaggy and Underfelt for naming their cumquat tree after Kakadu Udder for constantly picking on Stuckon to lead the down downs Janus for the apparently horrible Piss Weak beer Drunken for his resemblance to Saddam Hussein post-shaving Boomerang for his authentic multi-coloured Aussie tan Punch for asking whether there was any pork in the turkey and finally Emu something to do with puddles which I now cant remember.
Duly, the raffle was drawn, and everyone departed leaving Boomer with the right amount of dirty dishes, beery floor, christmas cracker rubbish and enough leftovers to feed him til Christmas Day.
Any other deviate business conducted on the evening (which did include Mummies Boy and Kakadu giving interesting renditions of hash songs) I have forgotten as Heat Stroke Victim No 19.
Scribe: Rolf Harris
PS: For those who asked, the recipe for
Plum Pudding Ice Cream 1 litre of good vanilla ice cream 1.5 cups of fruit mix well macerated with brandy or sherry or whatever you fancy just dont be stingy 2 teaspoons of cocoa 1 teaspoon each of cinnamon, nutmeg and ginger 1 violet crumble (crushed) (optional)
Soften ice cream (dont melt it) and then mix in other ingredients. Refreeze overnight. To make larger quantities, increase all ingredients proportionally but be careful with the spices add a little more and then taste.
UPCUMMING