Date: 11-Feb-15
Hare: Mother Trucker and Blood Sucker
Venue: Mordialloc (Un)Sporting Club
That notorious stirrer Peanuts is fomenting trouble in the ranks because she reckons Cut Loose needs to be replaced as GM. She wants to bring on a spill motion. Senior figures said the following:
E&B’s Press Statement
“I categorically deny that I am a stalking horse for the GM position or that I’m behind the spill motion. Cut Loose has my full unconditional support. I expect her to lead us to the next AGM”
E&B Inner Most Thoughts
“Oh, how I longingly long to be the GM again. We’d have Saturday afternoon tea dances, dress-up parties every month that has an “r” in it, everyone would learn how to play a musical instrument, all charges would be in song…….”
Udder’s Press Statement
“Cut Loose is an excellent GM. She’s got great leadership qualities and she’s achieved some terrific innovations this year. She has my full support.”
Udder’s IMTs
“Cut Loose is OK I suppose, but I was a much better GM. None of this spill nonsense would have happened when I was GM. At least Cut Loose isn’t as bad as Deeper – nothing ever happened when he was GM.”
Deeper’s Press Statement
“Cut Loose is an excellent GM. She’s got great leadership qualities and she’s achieved some terrific innovations this year. She has my full support.”
Deeper’s IMTs
“Cut Loose is OK I suppose, but I was a much better GM. None of this spill nonsense would have happened when I was GM. At least Cut Loose isn’t as bad as Udder – nothing ever happened when he was GM.”
Klingon’s Press Statement
“I don’t intend to comment on the leadership spill motion. Any public comment will only fuel speculation. The GM-ship must be sorted out within the Committee, not amongst the electronic graffiti of the Twitter sphere.”
Klingon’s IMTs
“Gimme a couple of free beers and I’ll tell you everything.”
Two Bottoms’ Press Statement
“Cut Loose is the best GM we’ve had since Cheesecake. She’s inspiring, she’s got great ideas and the circles have been terrific .”
Two Bottoms’ IMTs
“I’m very hurt by the challenge to Cut Loose, but I’m not going to take it to heart. I’m going to turn my other five cheeks and put it all behind behind me.”
LuBangOz’s Press Statement
“I’m not prepared to say that I don’t support Cut Loose unconditionally, nor that I won’t challenge if the opportunity doesn’t arise. I refuse to deny claims that I won’t give a commitment that I may not support Peanuts spill motion. At this stage, the numbers are not inconclusive.”
LuBang’s IMTs
“Que???!!!”
Lotsa Fun’s Press Statement
“Cut Loose is a great GM, I really like her. We’ve had lots of fun this year at hash events she’s organised. I’m definitely going to vote for her.”
Lotsa Fun’s IMTs
“I hope Prickly Bush cooks Italian for her run in a couple of weeks. I really love her pasta dishes. Maybe a vegetarian lasagne with roasted Asian vegetables? Or maybe cannelloni with baby spinach and goat fetta?”
Cut Loose’s Press Statement
“I’m confident that I have the full support of Lakeside going forward. We’re a strong team and I’ll be leading us to the next AGM.”
Cut Loose’s IMTs
“Bugger being more collegiate. I wonder if I can roast peanuts in my Thermie?”
Despite all the turmoil, the business of hash had to go on.
Virgin hares Blood Sucker and Mother Trucker were dragged out the front.
E&B described the run – hares did well without a mentor, run went to the beach where Astro and LuBangOz got lost, the rest headed south and over the Mordialloc Creek and down to the old racecourse where there are some really cute wetlands. We ran a figure 8, but technically the hares didn’t cross trail as we went under the Mordialloc Bridge on the out-trail and over it on the in-trail.
Hooraytio described the walk – they were protected from the wind, they followed pink arrows, there was lovely scenery, they maintained a good heart rate. And they got the hiccups? Too tired and emotional perhaps? Run/walk awarded 85/100 which is a High Distinction.
Naming
Janet, whose surname is Walker, was christened Jaywalker by stand-in RA Barbie’s Box.
Returnees
Mothball, Lethal, Peanuts, Nashi, E&B, Quick Lay.
Special runs
Pointy x 895, Lethal x 368.
Charges
- Spread on because it’s Chinese New Year.
- Klingon because he had his 38th parallel (latitude) run from the Mordialloc Hotel in April 95.
- Lethal, E&B, Swamp Rat – they’ve been selected as Australia’s wild card entries for the next Eurovision Song Contest.
- Mothball because it took him only 7 seconds from arrival to whinge about the wind, the beach, the sand.
- Mother Trucker for making the mistake of setting trail with his wife.
- Pointy for being over-animated at Melb Ladies weekend.
- Wedgie was awarded some hideous shorts to wear back in Germany.
- Barbie’s Box for removing her underwear in the prickly bush down the beach.
- Sweaty Box because she’s a box.
- Cheesecake for taking off over Mordialloc Creek like Hi Ho Silver.
- Astro for being Hi Ho Silver.
- Punch for achieving 200 runs and Udder for forgetting to mention her 200 runs.
- Jaywalker for not being able to walk a straight line.
- Shu Shu, Shoe Shopper and Wet Patch for who knows? but they deserved it.
- Matthias because this is his last Lakeside charge.
Then things got interesting. About 9pm. the Club’s security guard told us we had to stop the down-downs as they constitute sculling games which aren’t allowed under their liquor licence. We struggled on with really quiet, slow down-downs. Turns out Wet Patch can make a down-down last 10 minutes! Sadly the guard, a man of immense personal charm with a girth to match, was determined to get us out and had the bar closed down. It’s very disappointing for our two virgin hares who put on a great run/walk followed by a circle where we were all having a great time when interrupted.
PS. Congratulations to Klingon for organising the’ 7 marathons in 7 days on 7 continents’ at the weekend.
Scribe: Cheesecake