The internet extract below is especially for 2 Bottoms who didn’t believe me when I told him about Percy Grainger and his whips. As a child, Percy lived a couple of doors away from the New Bay Hotel.
Not for nothing is Percy Grainger (1882-1961) considered Australia’s most eccentric composer. In 1956, visiting his homeland from the United States, he deposited a mysterious locked chest marked “Private Matters” in his Melbourne bank vault, with instructions not to open it until 10 years after his death. Imagine the shock and scandal when the researchers and archivists who did the honors in 1971 discovered a Pandora’s Box containing more than 70 homemade whips (some fashioned out of conductors’ batons), an extensive pornography collection, and candid photographs documenting Grainger’s fetish and bondage experiments in clinical detail. He stipulated that these intimate artifacts be displayed in what he conceived of as the “Lust Branch” of the unassuming red-brick Grainger Museum he himself had founded (and funded) at the University of Melbourne; a rare example of an autobiographical museum endowed by its subject.
Speaking of Percy, the fabulous drink stop was all about balls and orgasms with home-made rum balls and lashings (pun alert) of orgasms aka Cointreau and Baileys. All this, while we enjoyed the view over the water towards the lights of Melbourne. The run was pretty good too, it took us through the old grounds of Brighton Tech which closed years ago because young Brightonians want to be stock brokers these days, not tradies. We trailed through the beautiful Kamesburgh Gardens, past Star of the Sea Chapel where Deeper got married, alongside Elsternwick State School till we got to Elster Creek which took us to Elsternwick Park where there was lots of running around in circles. Klingon found the trail which took us down Head St (the puns, the puns!!) to the beach where everyone, except Cooch, ignored the arrows and turned left for a magnificent run along the beach path to the drink stop.
New Bay Hotel served schnitzels about the size of a small country. Herewith are before and after shots of 2 Bottoms’ egg infested schnitz.
Egg infested schnitz the size of a country
Egg infected schnitz gone
The circle commenced with Lethal sharing a photo of GG hard at work at his day job.
GG Hard at Work
Racey Tracey described the run – it was a run of great quality, we circumnavigated churches, schools, aged care facilities, trees, and then stopped for a long time at the excellent drink stop. 74/74
Love Bra described the walk – hares were economical with the chalk. Awarded 18.5/16
Returnees
Prince, Spread On, Kevin, Add On, Love Bra
Special Runs
Cooch x 611, Add On x 200, Prince x 537, Cheesecake x 537.
Charges
- Prickly Bush and Deeper charged as hares.
- Prickly for discarding her superfluous orgasms into Port Phillip Bay.
- Kokup for kokking up his emails.
- Prickly Bush and Deerp for bringing rum balls and orgasms to the drink stop.
- Punch for having 2 balls and multiple orgasms.
- Cheesecake for telling 2 Bottoms about self flagellation and whips, and Swamp Rat for telling 2 Bottoms how to castrate horses with chloral hydrate.
- Saddle Sores for going to Sydney to run hash instead of staying for the Full Moon run.
- Lotsa for giggling when Deeper offered her an orgasm.
- Swamp Rat for calling Mother Trucker, Mother Fucker.
- Mother Trucker for showing too much cleavage.
- Racey for leading the runners from the back.
- Prince for following the walkers trail.
- Mothball because he can’t read a Melways.
- Cooch for following the trail right when we got to Elwood Beach, even though a blind man on a galloping horse would have known it was a falsie and we should be going left to Brighton.
