Lakeside Hash House Harriers
The drinking club with a running problem
Lakeside run on Wednesday nights starting at 6:30ish, usually within 10kms of the Melbourne CBD (Central Boozing District). Runs cost $2, the food costs $3 unless it is at a pub, and drinks cost $2. Visitors are always welcome – just show up and ask for a drink!
LAKESIDE HASH-HOUSE HARRIERS COMMITTEE 2002 – 2003
The Uncommitted
Grand Master in absentia
Mummies Boy (Phillip Edwards) Ph: 9479 1978
Sergeant @ Arms in absentia
Baa-baa-ra (Kevin Kitchingham) Ph: 0414 770 288
Hash Kash
Stuck -On (Wendy Guo) Ph: 9534 5495
Hash On-sex
Too Dumb to Die (Ian Morgan) Ph: 0439 944 945
Social Sex
Eggn Bacon Pie (Lorraine Gierck) Ph: 9421 1134
Trail Master
Cooch (Rowan Compagnoni) Ph: 9421 1134
Grog Master
Janus (Hugh Watts) Ph: 0419 698784
Religious advisor
Cheesecake (Elizabeth Kelly) Ph: 9521 8038
Web Master
The Boomerang (Jon Miller) Ph: 9523-1694
Hash Haberdashery
Lotsa Fun (Lai Fun) Ph: 9815-2363
Occasional Hash Flash
Shunt (Keith Ralph) Ph: 9570 4689
Honorary Hash Horn
IBM (Martin Evans) Ph: 0401-147-796
Checkin Chicken and Acting GM
Udder Idjit (David Cheeseman) Ph: 0414 716 382
LSH3 Email all@lakesidehash.asn.au
Web Site www.LakesideHash.asn.au
Hash Trash contact jsbibm@pacific.net.au
LAKESIDE HASH HOUSE HARRIERS HASH TRASH
Run 959 4/12/02 Western Suburbs AGPU
Venue: Station Hotel, Footishcry
Hare: Wings
After E&Bs Durham Death March re-enactment of 27/11 anything would have seemed a walk in the park. We were grateful for Wings much shorter trail around the wastelands and prime potential real-estate of greater Footscray/Flemington area although it was defined by plenty of long, fast stretches punctuated by the occasional check and, quite noticeably for an AGPU run, no piss stop! Only the dumb or persistent bothered with the last kilometer of trail, running past the pub to take a loop around Footscray Train Station and back on-in.
Our accommodating Lakeside hashers forwent their usual Wednesday night gathering, throwing their circadian rhythms off kilter and making for a generally grumpy morning at work when they realised that the weekend was still three days away. It would have all been worth it if wed come away with a bum-bag or some socks or even another stupid t-shirt. Instead all our measly $10 got us was a measly meat n taters meal, served a la Stalag 17 from bain maries by a very hairy man who seemed on the cusp of shouting “NO SOUP FOR YOU” to some of the more unruly D&E types whod shown up.
Western Suburbs managed to pull the suckers in from far and wide this year. The usual Melburnians and Peninsulites were well represented, along with Geelong and (previously unknown to this writer) Corio Bay Hashers. The latter apocryphally formed when a daughter of Sapphos fronted up at Geelong and introduced a hashmans wife to the joys of bean flicking.
After dispensing summary justice upon the deserving hare, Lester the Molester called the GMs of these various groups were up for a charge. The Boomerang represented Lakeside since our actual GM is busy in Kenya trying to work the kinks out of some defective Russian Army surplus missile launchers. The former GMs of Western Suburbs were called up, which essentially meant that the entire Western Suburbs Hash gave themselves a free beer.
The assembled were then honoured to witness a WSH3 naming as Byron was christened Titanic (aka Tits) with a champagne bottled upside his forehead. Boner was brought out and festooned with a wooden dunny seat for his much-anticipated Worst Run of the Year Award. Yours truly was then given the Best Run of the Year Award for doing nought but bringing a little class to the Western Suburbs.
Other seminal events included the return of the WSH3 banner, the announcement of Wings and Downsizings engagement, and Melbourne Monk drinking out of his shoe. Then it was time to introduce the Western Suburbs “Same Same But Different” 2003 Committee. Ginger Beer was appointed GM in Absentia, and all of the 2002 committee members swapped places, except for Benny the Beast who is still the only guy they can get to haul the grog out week after week.
Corrections Department:
The Management wishes to acknowledge that it was not a Scotsman who ended up through a windshield and under the knife in Amman, but rather a Yorkshireman. The Management apologises to any Scottish members of the reading public as a Scotsman would obviously have had more sense.
On-On
TDTD
UPCUMMING RUNS
Date Run Number Hare Venue Melways Et Cetera 11/12/02 960
“Coburg Challenge”
Remover La Paella Spanish Restaurant, 217 Sydney Road, Brunswick 29 G9 $12 por comida 18/12/02 961 SBD Gasworks Park, Richardson St, Port Melbourne 2J H7 Virgin hare!! 25/12/02 962
X-mas Run
Santa Claus North Pole Ho ho ho. Seriously though.. see Cooch if you are interested in running or setting an Xmas day run 1/1/03 963
Nothing Happens on New Years Day Run
TDTD Richmond U2 Still to be confirmed. Minimal run with drinks/dinner at pub.
Other Events
When What Where Melways Et Cetera 14/12/02 Lakeside Xmas Party Dennis Trattoria, 21 Bond Street, CBD (off Flinders St between Queen and Elizabeth) Santa will be there for all to enjoy $40 and bring a $5 Kris Kringle 6 pm drinks, 7 pm dinner Contact E&B on gierckie@tpg.com.au for more info 29-30 March 2003 Rutherglen BASH Weekend Victorian Hotel, Rutherglen See E&B or Cooch for more details