LAKESIDE HASH HOUSE HARRIERS HASH TRASH
Run 996 13 August 2003
Nelsons Place, Sandringham
IBM and Swallower
Well, thats it then isnt it ? Stop the counting, send the bookies home, hand out the gongs, and suspend play for the rest of the term. Frankly its impossible to envisage a better night during annus gerbillius than the one weve just had. Stunning suburb, million dollar house (with pool but sadly no back garden), fiendishly brilliant run set in balmy winter weather that was hotter than a Shane Warne text message and not a drop of rain until everyone was safely tucked up back home, top tucker (excepting Bovines now weekly spoiling tactics of offloading 75 packets of snakes and chewwies pre supper), virile hare, supermodel cook, roaring log fire, and a basket full of toys for the kiddies to play with too. And theres more the hare did the washing up even though he hadnt put a cheque in the post or he hadnt made any promises regarding mouths of any sort at any time recently. Frankly the hare and cook should be showered with praise and naked nubile Philippino chamber maids / bell hops covered in honey for their services to Lakeside hash (memo to Lottsa will the budget stretch that far ?). A pack of precisely 4 had gathered by 6.30pm, fortunately swollen (oh err !) to almost 30 by the time 6.45pm came along and it was time to depart. The trail was a veritable classic with more falsies on display than on an average Melbourne Harriets run. The intention was to keep the pack together during inclement weather but the weather didnt play along so it proved more enjoyable than planned (rats !). The back passages of Sandy were thoroughly explored (many of which Toto admitted prior knowledge of) before Sandy “shopping centre” (OK 3 shops and a library) were perused on the way to arriving at the beachfront. At this point Nick was grateful, admitting the hares jiggery pokery had got his normally reliable radar thoroughly confused on arriving bayside he at least knew there was one way the trail wouldnt be heading. A short sprint around the “botty boy” bushes on the prom and back via the railway line to the warmth of home. Supermodel cook then wowed the masses with masses of (wow !) mash and stew, so good that Generic Hasher asked for the recipe (answer buy loads of meat and veg, chuck in pot with water, cook for 3 hours. Derr ! Hash name of Jamie Oliver coming up ?). Seconds and thirds were consumed by all before it was found that afters of a stonking Bread and Butter (BB !) pud was on the menu. This is the sort of stuff that put the Great into Britain (couldve been spotted dick, you lot were lucky). The sated pack then lurched towards the table for charges dispensed by the gruesome twosome of Gerbils and TDTD and poured by Rolf (who appears to be making a takeover bid against Janus for position of grogmaster). Mothball cruelly under-rated and underscored the run for the Hares, Stuckon and Lottsa were given a SARS drink (just when we all thought it was safe etc etc), Tugger (and the fruit of his loins Caitlin) was welcomed back, and GG finally got certified by ex-GM Mummies Boy (about 7 months too late). Plugga and Tugga got charged as buggas, Gerbils for playing with the toychest (theres a joke in there but Ill let it go), BB for allowing her husband to waste away (Highly Infectious now slimmed down to Hi Fec), and Bovine for kicking down a signpost whilst limbering up on the run (theres goes the neighbourhood and up go my bloody rates). Pointpost was charged for being a braniac (would never have guessed looking at him), Plugger and TDTD for deserting LSH3 for foreign (to Melbourne any rate) climes, and Cooch / Sooty / Generic hasher for wearing “heritage guernesys” (old and yellow the jerseys that is, not them). Assembled left handers were given drinks from left handed cups to sup from as this was the International Day of Left Handers (no Im not making this up) and frankly this explains a lot about the likes of Swallower, Udder etc. Cheesecake drank for liking B&B pudding (rather than cheesecake), Kakadu Dax drank for something I forgot to note down (grey hair ?), and E&B for not wearing hash togs until she revealed she was modeling the prototype of the soon-coming LSH3 fleece (reversible, washable, terrible). It is called a fleece because she will be charging you $99.99 for one but feel the quality madam ..After that we had the raffle where Cooch won something to sit on that looked bloody painful to anyone that may try such a thing. GG yelled something about next weeks run being the Malvern Tavern, Malvern Rd, Malvern, Plugger plugged this weekends LSH3 pub-crawl, the GM plugged the 1000th, and then everyone departed to leave the poor hare to do more washing up, floor mopping, and mending of broken furniture. On and indeed on to the CBD pubcrawl and then Malvern ye noble stuckons, er I mean bacons !
On-On
IBM