LAKESIDE HASH HOUSE HARRIERS
ELECTRONIC HASH TRASH
RUN NO. 926
17 APRIL 2002
HARE : QUASI MOTO
VENUE: Pasley Street (off Punt Road) on the basket ball courts
Grand Master: Egg & Bacon Pie
(Lorraine Gierck) Ph: (03) 9421-1134 (H) gierckie@tpg.com.au
Sergeant-at-Arms: Gerbils
(Cathy Devries)(& Deputy GM); rec@johnhopkins.com.au
Hash Kash: Point Post
(David Shearn) Ph: (03) 9885 9906 H
Hash On-secs: Nobody
serving in this position – Desperately seeking a desperate person who wants to help out til the end of our tenure!
Social Secretary: Cheesecake
(Elizabeth Kelly)Ph: 9212 1942 (w) 9521 8038 (h)
Trail Mistrress: Lipstick
(Judith Pound)judithpound@hotmail.com (0415 195 0930)
Grog
Master: Barbaaara (Kevin Kitchingham)kitch_and_sheeds@bigpond.com.au (0414 770 288)
Religious advisor: IBM
(Martin Evans)(03) 9521 9439 (H)
Web Master: The Boomerang
(Jon Miller)Ph: (03) 9523-1694 (H)
Hash Haberdashery: Whinging Pom
(Margaret Collette)zamarg@hotmail.com
Committee Member: Rugarse
( Paul Hooper) Leave of Absence for rest of year
Chechin Chicken: Janus
(Hugh) 0419 698 784
Hash Horn: Too Dumb to Die
(Ian Morgan) Leave of absence for rest of year 9421 5221(H)
Web Site:
www.lakesideHash.asn.au
Run Report
Once a pon a time there lived a little girl who wanted to travel far, far away from where she was brought up, and she ended up in Melbourne. She tried to make friends by joining the best hash in the city, and by and by, the time came when she felt she really should pull her weight so she laid a trail. There was a nother little girlie who used to yell at people and who made out she knew everything so our little girl asked the nother little girlie to assist her in laying her first run in the city. Well, all would have been fine, except there was this big, nother girlie too who used to yell even louder than the little girlie, so our little girl from far away thought that this big girlie would be the perfect choice to tell everyone the location of her run. Wrong. The big girlie just pretended to broadcast the venue to everyone when really, in fact, all she did was print it in a book used for signatures on the night. First lesson learnt by little girl from far away: dont rely on the big girls to notify the rest of the group your intricate plans.
Anyway, one could only hope the nother little girlie would make the wandering little girls first hash a huge success. Wrong again! Dont rely on short, nother girlies they only remember half the rules (of which there usually werent any at all) mind you, the rule she remembered was a good one, and thus no trail was laid across a busy intersection without going via the little button on the pole first. However, it probably wouldve been a bit of a quicker run if someone had pressed the little button to make the green man appear, but hey: this is a story about all things being against the little foreigner. Third lesson: if you actually want people to get OFF the traffic island in the middle of the busy intersection, dont send dogs on the run. We all know (or we do now, anyway) that dogs ruin everything and just want to run! Who else could possibly have thought of pressing the button on the pole to make the traffic stop? Chiko obviously knew that there was no chance in hell of anyone hearing calls on such a busy road so he used the “green man method” instead.
So the runners ran, and the walkers went home and the slow coaches dawdled around in the dark, occasionally being interrupted by perfectly drawn round checks in various attempts to spread the group as far away as possible into the darkness of the lake and the golf course. All regrouped again by another perfectly drawn circle only to be split up again in different directions in the attempt to get everyone simultaneously.
All eventually arrived back at the starting point, wondering why they were told to bring umbrellas a past habit from the old country of the little girl.
Back at the start, which turned out to be the end, the little girl was surprised to find such a rabble, with everyone talking at once. At least, she thought, they all wanted to talk. So she and her trainer, the nother little girlie, were brought into the circle to be judged. Unfortunately the Prince did not give a very favorable report so the big girl with the loud voice asked for a more feminine, favorable approach to this new runner. A Nother wee girlie with a posh voice defended our little girl to the hilt, but unfortunately they dont makeem too bright in Italy, and in trying to give a better judgement, Deep Throat actually down-graded the run even more. Lesson number as stated above dont trust short girls to give you high marks.
Newcomers to the hash were welcomed and emplored to return next week for their own sake who could possibly live in Melbourne without the fun of Lakeside Hash? So Plugger (Run No. 1) and Boobs (Run No. 1) were forced to print their contact details in the signature book for all to see and useat will, along with Miss Rambos (Run No. 2). Pog was also made to feel all gooey and welcomed for his 3rd run. Stuck On was welcomed back into the fold of being a runner for the first time in 15 months.
Miss Rambo, Lizard, Klingon, and Udder were welcomed in a new light as nursing mothers of their four legged mates and Toto jumped on the back to join the dogs life for a beer too.
Wings and Downsizing waited until after the run to make their journey across town to the run just so they could talk all their way through the circle and not have any idea of what was going on and ensuring everyone around them was the same. Beers were duly awarded for some reason.
Lipstick continued to appreciate Baabarra more and more as she did the job of wetting everyones whistles. Lizard will also be a happy man to see Baabarra and Point Post again. The tall lassie with the great voice wouldnt mind seeing Mummies Boy again too for similar reasons!
All adjourned for dinner at the local pizza joint where Quasi Moto abused the owner for not giving us all a meal that would break his bank. Account. Very nice, pain giving, pizza and bread and pasta was had by those who attended and they all lived happily every after for the next 7 days.
On On until next time
E&B
NEXT WEEKS RUN
Run 927 24 April 2002 : Udder Idjits St Georges Day Run from his place at 14 Dalmont St, Highett VIC 3190 Dress in Pommy Clobber for his patron saints day. MR 77 B9
Forthcoming Runs
Run 928 25 April 2002
: Tangles ANZAC Day Lunch time Run at from somewhere in the city call Tangles or E&B for details of the Pub Lunch venue.
Run 929 1 May 2002
: Queen Beas run from Boomers Place 4/39 Horne Street Elsternwick
Run 930 8 May 2002
: Whippetts Pre-Adventure Hash with Bovine Breeder in North Melbourne (sounds like it could be another good green currie!!!) I bet its from that restaurant that supplied me with 6 months worth of rice!
And just in case you dont get told again:
Run 931
15 May 2002 : Barterbitchs HP Memorial Run in St Kilda (sounds like the tomato sauce patrol! Wear Red to hide the stains!)
Run 932
22 May 2002 : Baarbaaras run from home in Mt Waverley
Run 933
29 May 2002 Cheesecake
Run 934
5 June 2002 : Father and Miss Piggy from Fitzroy
Social Stuff
21 April weekend Joint mountin weekend with Western Suburbs at Hotham. See Deep Throat for details, or Wings
18th May
7p.m. start. Dinner and the Trots Night at Moonee Valley Racecourse See CHEESECAKE for details or read the flyer in the runs book when you sign your name.
Parking and entry off McPherson Street
Melways 28 K7
AGPU
: Think about articles to put in a magazine; photographs; advertising. If anyone has contacts with a potential sponsor who could help pay for great t-shirts or giveaways please let E&B know asap. You may like to advertise yourself in our mag!
INTRAHASH STUFF
25 April 2002 : Peninsula Ladies HHHs 1250th run from 43 Foot Street, Frankston and on on at Luckys restaurant. Run starts at 7pm. Check their website for details.
7 May 2002 : Peninsula Men HHHs AGM at Frankston United Soccer Club, McClelland Drive Langwarrin MR 103 1E.
INTERHASH 2002
Goa in India is the place to be on the last weekend on September this year. Check the website for details. All Lakesiders registered please contact E&B.