Lakeside Hash House Harriers The drinking club with a running problem
LAKESIDE HASH HOUSE HARRIERS COMMITTEE 2006-2007
Grand Master: Phillip “Prince” Johnson Relig. Advisor: David “Point Post” Shearn Hash Cash: Mirian “Tiger Moth” Cruz Grog Master: David “Mothball” De Freitas Checking Chicken: Lai “Lotsa Fun” Leicester Sgt@Arms: Nick “NickleB” Leicester & Phillip “Mummies Boy” Edwards Soc Sec: Dana “Dangerous” Clementz On Sec: Liz “Cheesecake” Kelly Hash Haberdash: Lorraine “Egg & Bacon Pie” Hare Raiser: “The Shah”, “Flem “& “It Wasn’ Me” Hash Flash: Eva “Codpiece” Cox Web Master: John “Klingon” Perkins
Run 1217, 25 July 2007 Hare: Mothball and TigerMoth Venue: 23 Pitt St Ashburton
It’s the revenge of the Hares!! First, The Shah makes us run a Tour de France by setting the run from his bike, then LubangOz makes us do a Burke and Wills through Hawthorn. Now Mothball tells us we have to run 8 kms down the Gardiners Creek flood plain before we can have any Christmas dinner. Where do they get off thinking that hashers are athletes. How to make a really long run even longer? Do the on-home twice. The moral, Mothball, is to keep the on-out far away from the on-in.
The pack took off wearing silly Christmassy gear under cover of darkness. It Wasn’t Me was an ELF and Cod“I am not an ELF”Piece was a sparkly Dimmeys $2.99 a metre fir tree, but she sure looked like an ELF. Chicko thought she was an ELF cos he didn’t do to her what he did to a Hawthorn nature strip last week. Cheesecake fed her attention seeking insecurities by wearing 57 tree decos like bells, baubles, shiny balls, gold trinkets which made the best noise on the run and made it a hellishly hard to hear ON calls. The pack stuck together, – who wants to look silly alone?
Now to the business end of the run – the food. Heaps of mulled wine, roast pork, ham, all the trimmings, crème caramel for afters. Mothball did the washing-up and Tiger made us sing Christmas carols.
Since TigerMoth had Max Cuscuz’s bottom shaved, everyone had their backs to the wall when she was about. Max’s bottom shaving assists no end with his velocity maximisation and wind resistance minimisation between sleeping spots.
The hares were awarded 8/10 for the run and 2/10 for the food, making it 10/10. (Not athletes and not accountants either!!)
(Thanks to Mothball and TigerMoth for making a great effort for the Christmas run.)
Visitors Rockachelli and Tug from Royal Peninsula, Brazillian Bordello Babe, Scrotweiller, Luciano.
Special Runs Prince x 225 Cheesecake x 225 E&B x 265 Cod “I am not an ELF” Piece x 20.
Charges ? Cheesecake for imitating a scrap metal truck. ? Mothball for only marking one arrow per straight stretch – keep him away from the Nullabor. ? NickleB – something rude to do with Christmas carols. ? Tigermoth for reading Harry Potter and the Deadly Hallows in French. ? E&B for arriving late, yakking on the phone for half an hour and then shortcutting. ? GG for hating Kevin Sheedy and getting him sacked. (When laying this charge, Mummie’s Boy let it be known that he is a good and close friend of Matthew Lloyd. He broke toes on his right foot during this monumental name drop.) ? Cheesecake for shedding Christmas decorations. ? Scrotweiller for having a punch-up with a cyclist on the bike path and for being able to bite his own bum. ? Pointy for knowing too much about the old Alamein railway. ? Sooty for talking about NZ rugby instead of AFL and for being a girl and not being able to follow a map. ? GG for being a misogynistic oik for making the previous charge. ? GM for performing too well as GM. ? Fashion charges for Cod “I am not an ELF” Piece, LubeOil and It Wasn’t Me for slaving over hot sewing machines to become Christmas trees and elves. ? Craven Moorehead for getting lost. ? Cooch for low profile. ? Cheesecake for propositioning Cooch by offering to take off her baubles.
Announcements ? Next week’s run – Two Bottoms from the gay pub Flying Duck Hotel in Bendigo St Prahran. ? 25-26 August Melb Ladies 1600th at Marysville. ? 22-23 September – Bike Hash in Beechworth. ? Balls Up in October – it’s annoying when you’re selling something and you’re not taken seriously eg. Tug and Rockacelli from Royal Peninsula, flogging the Balls Up to Christmas-mulled-wine infested Lakesiders. They persevered – there’s a lay-by, Harvey Norman type payment plan so you can pay a bit weekly. There’s also a bus taking you between those hourly-rate motels in Sth Dandenong should you get really, really lucky on the night.
Scribe: Cheesecake
Announcements:
New LSH3 rugby top for sale! Available in several colours; collar is denim. $30. ‘How to order’ details to follow from ‘E’n’B.
Upcoming Events
Next Full Moon run: Run No. 88, at 3pm 24 June 2007. Hares: Committee. Location: Wesburn Park, Old Warburton Road Wesburn, map 289 C9,. On-afters at the Sam Knot Hotel Warburton Highway, Wesburn, map 289 F9
Upcoming Runs See Upcoming runs page