Lakeside Hash House Harriers The drinking club with a running problem
LAKESIDE HASH HOUSE HARRIERS COMMITTEE 2006-2007
Grand Master: Phillip “Prince” Johnson Relig. Advisor: David “Point Post” Shearn Hash Cash: Mirian “Tiger Moth” Cruz Grog Master: David “Mothball” De Freitas Checking Chicken: Lai “Lotsa Fun” Leicester Sgt@Arms: Nick “NickleB” Leicester & Phillip “Mummies Boy” Edwards Soc Sec: Dana “Dangerous” Clementz On Sec: Liz “Cheesecake” Kelly Hash Haberdash: Lorraine “Egg & Bacon Pie” Hare Raiser: “The Shah”, “Flem “& “It Wasn’ Me” Hash Flash: Eva “Codpiece” Cox Web Master: John “Klingon” Perkins
Run 1222, 29 August 2007 Hare: Cheesecake Venue: Danish Club 177 Beaconsfield Pde Middle Park.
You know you’ve set an excellent run when Mothball really, really, really complains. It’s difficult, when one is both hare and scribe, to step back and describe one’s run objectively, dispassionately, without bias, with the appropriate degree of constructive criticism. So stuff that. It was the best run of this or any other year. Didn’t lose anyone and when they came home, they all looked like they’d been ridden hard and put away wet. And best of all, they all grizzled about the cobblestones.
99.9% (recurring) of the run was through the alleys and back lanes of Albert and Middle Parks. Once upon a time, before Cooch and The Shah organised the Melbourne Water “if it’s yellow, let it mellow. If it’s brown, flush it down” campaign, everyone had backyard dunnies backing onto laneways so the night-man would replace the full cans with empties and carry them away on his night-cart. At night. Looking at these grand houses from the front, you’d never know the residents had to ablute.
Another once upon a time, when Denis was a mouthy tiny tot who barracked for Melbourne FC, his family lived in an old house set on open timber stumps in Camperdown and had an outdoor dunny. The night-man would come down the off-side of the house, do the can switcheroo, then carry the full one on his shoulder down the on-side, to his truck. One night, young Denis helpfully left his trike out on the on-side. Night-man tripped, night-man and full can went sprawling with can contents flying past stumps to underside of house. Night-man fled. The house and its crusty foundations are still there, but I won’t give address in case you’re planning a Camperdown tree-change. Denis got a good spanking. Don’t know if he got punished.
First home were Boxy and Dumbbastard. They are working for Dept of Defence on top secret things which they can’t disclose. Unless you ask them. I’d say one of the top secret things is elephant juice because they must be on it to get home half an hour before anyone else and still do the whole trail. Otherwise Cooch, Whippet and Scrottweiler led the pack.
The Shah returned to us with his new bride, Harleh. She did the whole run and might be a serious athlete.
We pretty much had the back bar of the Danish Club to ourselves apart from ancient photos of the Sth Melb footy club posted around the walls. Apparently the club is the home to Syd Swans whenever they’re in town. Also home to Princess Mary. What a juxtaposition.
Hare awarded 7.5 out of 11. Geniuses are never appreciated.
Virgin hasher Harleh.
Returnees Scrottweiler, Dumbbastard, The Shah, Lizard, Udder., Klingon.
Significant Runs Point Post x 586, TigerMoth x 199, Boxy x 19.
Charges * Prince, Codpiece, Lotsa Fun, NickleBy, Whippet for finishing the 2 hour endurathon that was the Full Moon Run. * It Wasn’t Me for being quoted in the “Economist” magazine. * Cooch for distributing suss white powder. * Srottweiler for wearing new shoes. * NickleBy for sounding like GG. * Dumbbastard for cranking his shank on the run. * Flem for putting the flem into Flemington and giving the horses horse flu. * Mothball for not being able to see the moon which is 5 quintillion sizes bigger than him. * Codpiece for not being blonde and still forgetting stuff. * Flem for kicking Chicko. * Boxy and Dumbbastard for superior hashing, superior athleticism, and superior economising of the truth re their early on-home. * Mothball the Misogynist for his sexist oik comments about women (including the trouble and strife) not being able to read maps. * Harleh the waterwaster for wasting good water on down downs when she could be drinking beer. * GG for being in Sydney Swans territory. * Codpiece for using NickleBy as a benchmark for athletic achievement.
Next Week’s Run
Lomond Hotel, 225 Nicholson St, cnr Blyth St, E Brunswick, Melways 29, K7. Hare: Mummie’s Boy
Announcements 22/23 September Bike Hash Beechworth. October –
Scribe: Cheesecake
Announcements:
New LSH3 rugby top for sale! Available in several colours; collar is denim. $30. ‘How to order’ details to follow from ‘E’n’B.
Upcoming Events
Next Full Moon run: Run No. 91, at 3pm 23 September 2007. Hares: Meri & Chaisw Lyons. Location: The recreation grounds in Cockatoo, Map 311 G 6
Upcoming Runs See Upcoming runs page